December 7: When Service Turns Into Pride
People come to you for advice now. When did you start enjoying that a little too much?
“For who maketh thee to differ from another? and what hast thou that thou didst not receive? now if thou didst receive it, why dost thou glory, as if thou hadst not received it?”
There’s a danger that creeps in with time in recovery. You’ve got some sober days behind you. People respect you at meetings. Newcomers ask for your number. Maybe you sponsor someone, or lead a small group at church. And somewhere along the way, you start to feel important.
It’s subtle. You find yourself giving advice nobody asked for. You get irritated when someone doesn’t follow it. You tell your story with a little more polish each time, and a little more of you as the hero. You notice who’s doing recovery right and who isn’t. You start to feel like you’ve arrived.
Paul asks the Corinthians three sharp questions. Who makes you different? What do you have that you didn’t receive? And if you received it, why do you boast as if you didn’t?
That cuts right through it. Your sobriety is a gift. You didn’t pull it off on your own. Someone carried the message to you. God did what you couldn’t. People put up with you when you were a mess. Every good thing you have to offer someone else, you were given first.
The program warns about a trap sometimes called two-stepping: jumping from admitting the problem straight to carrying the message, skipping the work in between. A related trap catches people with years of sobriety: carrying the message while they’ve stopped working their own steps. Advice flows out, but nothing flows in. That’s a dry place, and it’s dangerous.
The fix is simple, though not easy. Keep working your own program. Keep going to meetings as someone who needs them, not just someone who helps out. Keep calling your own sponsor. Keep doing your nightly review. Keep confessing your faults. Stay a learner.
And when someone thanks you for helping, pass the thanks along. “Someone did the same for me. And God did the rest.”
One thing today
Call your own sponsor or a trusted friend today, not to help them, but to tell them honestly how you’re doing. Ask them if they’ve noticed any pride in you lately.
A prayer
Lord, everything I have to give, I received from You. Keep me from getting proud of what You’ve done. Keep me working my own recovery, humble and teachable. Amen.
Watch for pride as you work Step Twelve.
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