July 16: Lying Awake at Two in the Morning

It’s two in the morning. Your body is exhausted, but your mind won’t stop. It keeps replaying conversations, worries, things you should have said. Why can’t you just sleep?

This psalm says it’s useless to get up early and stay up late, worrying and working, because God gives sleep to the ones He loves. Sleep is a gift. It’s not something you earn by finishing your to-do list.

Sleep is often rough in early recovery. For years, drinking knocked you out at night. It wasn’t real rest, but it felt like it. Now your body is learning to sleep on its own again, and it can take weeks or months. If it’s bad or it lasts a long time, talk to a doctor. That’s not a failure. It’s taking care of the body God gave you.

But some of the sleeplessness isn’t about the body. It’s about control. Lying awake is often the mind trying to solve everything before morning. Pride whispers that if you just think hard enough, you can fix it all. You can’t. And trying keeps you awake.

That’s where humility comes in, even at two in the morning. Humility says, “I can’t solve this tonight. God is awake. I can rest.” It’s handing over the night shift.

A few practical things help. Get out of bed if you’ve been awake a long time. Sit somewhere dim and read something calm. A psalm works well. Write the worries down on paper, so your mind knows they’re saved somewhere and it can stop rehearsing them. Then pray over the list and go back to bed.

During the day, watch the coffee after lunch. Get outside in the morning light. Try to go to bed and wake up around the same time. These sound small. They add up.

And when you lie back down, try breathing slowly and saying a short prayer with each breath. “Lord, You are awake. I can rest.”

One thing today

Keep a notebook by your bed tonight. If you wake up worrying, write the worry down, pray one sentence over it, and close the notebook.

A prayer

Father, You give sleep to those You love. I’ve been trying to fix everything in the dark. I hand You the night. Let me rest, and help me trust You with what I can’t solve. Amen.

Letting go of control, even at night, is part of what Step Seven teaches.

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