April 11: Praying for the One You Resent
There’s at least one name on your list that won’t let go of you, no matter how many times you write it down.
“But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.”
Jesus asks for something that sounds impossible. Love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. He doesn’t say feel warm toward them. He says pray.
There’s an old piece of recovery wisdom that fits right here. When you can’t shake a resentment, pray for the person the way you’d pray for someone who is sick. Ask God to give them the good things you want for yourself: health, peace, a way through their troubles. Do it every day, even if you don’t mean it at first.
It sounds too simple. And on the first day, it might feel fake. You might say the words through gritted teeth. That’s all right. Say them anyway.
Something tends to shift with time. Not always quickly, but it shifts. Praying for someone makes it hard to keep rehearsing your case against them. You start to see them as a person with their own fears and wounds. The heat goes down. Many people find that after a couple of weeks of honest daily prayer, the resentment no longer runs the show.
This isn’t the same as saying what they did was fine. It isn’t the same as letting them back into your life if they’re unsafe. Forgiveness and trust are different things. You can pray for someone from a long way away.
Jesus gives the reason: so that you may be children of your Father. God sends rain on the just and the unjust. He’s generous to people who don’t deserve it, which includes all of us. When you pray for the person who hurt you, you start to look a little more like your Father.
One thing today
Pick the hardest name on your list. Pray for that person by name this morning and tonight. Ask God to give them health, peace and every good thing you’d want for yourself. Do it again tomorrow.
A prayer
Father, I don’t want to pray for them, but I’m going to. Bless them. Give them what they need. Soften my heart while I pray, and free me from this bitterness. Amen.
More on resentment and the inventory: Step Four.
Talk it through with Jimmy or Sarah — first month free
Jimmy and Sarah are AI sponsors who know the Twelve Steps and the Bible. They'll listen, walk the steps with you, and keep pointing you to real people: a meeting, a sponsor, a church.
Free to download · first month free, no card · adults 18+
After the first month, talking with Jimmy or Sarah needs Plus ($9.99/month or $59.99/year).
Get the daily reading by email
One short reading a day: a verse, a few honest words, one thing to do and a prayer. Unsubscribe any time.
We'll send one email to confirm. We never share your address.