April 12: When the Name Is Family
Some of the names on your list aren’t coworkers or strangers. They’re your mom, your dad, a brother, a sister, a child.
“And Joseph said unto them, Fear not: for am I in the place of God? But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive. Now therefore fear ye not: I will nourish you, and your little ones. And he comforted them, and spake kindly unto them.”
Family resentments run deep because family was there from the beginning. They know where to hit. And often the hurt goes back to when you were small and couldn’t do anything about it.
Joseph knew that kind of hurt. His brothers threw him in a pit and sold him as a slave. Years passed. Prison. Loneliness. When they finally stood before him, he had all the power. He could have paid them back.
Instead he wept. And then he said something that took him years to be able to say: you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good.
Notice he doesn’t pretend it wasn’t evil. He names it. Your inventory can do the same. Write the cause honestly. Your father’s drinking. Your mother’s coldness. The sibling who always got the attention. What happened, happened.
But Joseph also saw something bigger. God was at work even through the worst of it. That doesn’t excuse his brothers. It just means their evil wasn’t the end of the story.
Then comes the fourth column, and with family it can be tender. Some of your part may be things you did as an adult: the holidays you ruined, the calls you didn’t return, the money you borrowed. Write those plainly. Your part is not what was done to you as a child. Leave that out of the fourth column. If old childhood pain is heavy, a pastor or counselor can help you carry it.
Joseph’s last words to his brothers were kind. Don’t be afraid. I will provide for you. You may not be there yet. But God is able to bring you there, in His time.
One thing today
Find one family name on your list. Fill in all four columns for it, slowly. Then spend two minutes in prayer for that person, by name.
A prayer
God, family hurts in ways nothing else does. I don’t want to pretend it didn’t happen. But I want to see what You can do with it. Help me be honest about my part, and keep working good out of what was meant for harm. Amen.
The step behind this month’s readings: Step Four.
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