April 21: No Condemnation

You’ve been writing for a while now, and somewhere along the way, the shame got heavy.

This happens often in Step Four. The more you write, the more you see. Name after name. Harm after harm. Part of you starts to say: look at all this. Look at what kind of person you are.

Paul’s words are short and clear. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

Now. Not after you finish the inventory. Not after you make all your amends. Not after you’ve been sober for five years. Now.

That word “therefore” points back to everything Paul wrote before it, including his honest admission in the chapter right before this one: the good he wanted to do, he didn’t do, and the evil he didn’t want to do, he kept doing. He knew that struggle. And still: no condemnation.

There’s a difference between conviction and condemnation. Conviction says, this was wrong, and here’s the way forward. It leads to change. Condemnation says, you are wrong, and there’s no way out. It leads to despair, and despair has led plenty of people back to a drink.

Your inventory is meant to bring conviction, not condemnation. If the voice you’re hearing says you’re hopeless, that’s not God’s voice.

Here’s something practical: the inventory doesn’t only list failures. Write down your assets too. Times you were honest. People you loved well. The courage it takes to even do this step. An honest inventory includes both.

If shame is crushing you, take a break. Call someone. Read this verse out loud a few times. Then come back when you’re ready.

One more thing. Shame grows in silence and shrinks when it’s spoken to a safe person. You don’t have to read anyone your inventory yet. But you can tell your sponsor, plainly, that the shame is heavy today. That alone often loosens its grip.

One thing today

Add a short section to your inventory called assets. Write at least five good things that are true about you. Then read Romans 8:1 out loud, slowly.

A prayer

Jesus, the shame is heavy today. Thank You that there is no condemnation for me in You, not later, but now. Help me tell the difference between Your voice and the voice of shame. Amen.

Keep going, gently, with Step Four.

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