February 4: When Church Hurt You

Talk of God makes your chest tighten. The last time you trusted church people, it went badly.

Isaiah is describing God’s chosen servant, who Christians understand to be Jesus. And one of the first things said about Him is how gentle He is. A bruised reed He won’t break. A smoldering wick He won’t snuff out.

A reed that’s been bent is weak. One more push and it snaps. A wick that’s barely smoking is almost out. One breath and it’s dark. Jesus doesn’t push or blow. He protects what’s fragile.

Some people come to Step Two with deep wounds from religion. Maybe you were shamed in church for your drinking. Maybe someone used Bible verses as a weapon against you. Maybe a leader you trusted hurt you badly. Maybe you were told that real Christians don’t struggle like this, and so you stopped going.

Those wounds are real. God doesn’t ask you to pretend they didn’t happen. He grieves them too.

But it’s worth separating God from the people who misrepresented Him. Jesus saved His harshest words for religious people who loaded heavy burdens on others. He spent His time with the very people the religious crowd looked down on. If you’ve been bruised by religion, you’re the kind of person Jesus went looking for.

Step Two only asks you to come to believe in a Power greater than yourself. You don’t have to walk into a church this week if you’re not ready. You can start smaller. Read one of the Gospels on your own and watch how Jesus treats broken people. Talk to God privately, honestly, even angrily.

When you are ready to try a church again, look for one that’s honest about struggle. Some churches have recovery groups. Some pastors are themselves in recovery. They exist. You don’t have to find the perfect place, just a safe enough one.

One thing today

Read the first chapter of Mark in your own Bible. Notice who Jesus spends time with and how He treats them.

A prayer

Jesus, I’ve been hurt by people who said they spoke for You. Help me see who You really are. Be gentle with this bruised reed.

More on coming to believe: Step Two.

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