January 5: The Morning After
Your head hurts, your mouth is dry, and you’re trying to piece together what you said last night.
“For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”
This verse doesn’t pretend the night was fine. It says weeping may stay for the night. Some nights are long and dark, and some of them we make darker ourselves. God doesn’t ask you to call last night good.
But the verse doesn’t stop there. Joy comes in the morning. God’s anger, the psalm says, lasts a moment. His favor lasts a lifetime. That is the order of things with God: the hard part is short, the grace is long.
On a morning like this, shame shouts loudest. It says you’re hopeless. It says everyone is disgusted with you. It says you might as well drink again, because what’s the point. Shame is a terrible guide. It always points back to the bottle.
Here is something more useful than shame: honesty with kindness. You can look straight at what happened without beating yourself up. “I drank more than I meant to. I’m sick. I may owe someone an apology.” Those are facts. They are part of the unmanageable life Step One talks about. You don’t have to add “and I’m worthless” to the end.
Take care of your body first. Drink water. Eat something simple. If you are shaking, sweating, seeing or hearing things, or feel your heart racing, don’t wait it out alone. That needs a doctor.
Safety first. If you drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can be dangerous. Talk to a doctor before you quit.
Then, when your head is a little clearer, take one honest look at the night. Not to punish yourself. Just to see it. Mornings like this one are some of the clearest evidence you’ll ever have that drinking has stopped working.
Remember how you feel right now. Not to torment yourself later, but because your mind will try to forget. Some evening soon, a drink will look harmless again. This morning is the honest answer to that evening.
One thing today
Drink a full glass of water and eat something before noon. Then send one text to a sober person: “Rough night. Can you talk later?”
A prayer
God, I feel awful and I’m ashamed. Thank You that Your favor lasts longer than this morning. Help me take care of my body, tell the truth, and not drink to escape the feeling.
If the shame is heavy today, read this on shame after drinking.
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