A Prayer for Alcoholics: Praying for Someone Who Drinks
To pray for an alcoholic you love, ask God to reach them, protect them, and give you wisdom about your own part. You can’t make them sober, and your prayers aren’t a lever to pull. They are a way of handing someone you love to Someone who loves them more. Here is a prayer you can use.
A prayer for someone who drinks
“Lord Jesus, I bring ______ to You. You know how much they drink and why, better than I ever will. You love them more than I do. Reach them where I can’t. Protect them on the road, at work and at home. Let them see the truth about what alcohol is doing, and let them see it in a way that leads to help instead of despair. Put the right people in their path. Soften their heart toward You.
And Lord, help me. Show me what is mine to do and what is Yours. Keep me from nagging, covering up or giving up. Give me peace when nothing changes, and courage if something has to. In Your name, amen.”
What to ask God for
That they’d be safe. Ask God to guard their life and the lives of people around them.
That they’d hit the truth, not just bottom. Many people only reach out after a hard moment. Pray that the hard moment, when it comes, opens their eyes and doesn’t destroy them.
That help would be near. A friend in recovery, a doctor, a pastor, a meeting. Ask God to put those people in their way.
That you’d be wise. Knowing when to speak, when to be quiet and when to step back is hard. Ask for it every day.
Scripture to stand on
God goes after the one who wandered off. That’s the heart of Jesus’ parable of the lost sheep.
“What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it? And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing.”
And when you don’t know what to pray, the Spirit prays with you.
“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.”
Praying without trying to control
Prayer can quietly turn into another way to manage someone. “God, make them stop” is honest, and you can say it. But you’ll find more peace in also praying “God, Your will, not mine.” Their recovery is between them and God. Your part is love, honesty, prayer and your own safety.
Keep yourself safe
Pray, and also protect yourself. If they drive drunk, if they threaten or hurt anyone, or if a child is in danger, call 911. If someone is talking about suicide, call or text 988. If you live with abuse, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.
If they decide they want to quit drinking, help them see a doctor first.
Safety first. If you drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can be dangerous. Talk to a doctor before you quit.
Something to do today
Write their name on a card and put it where you’ll see it each morning. Pray the prayer above once a day this week. Then pick one thing you’ll stop doing that covers for their drinking, and one person you’ll talk to about how you’re doing. If you’re married to someone who drinks, see the prayer for my husband who drinks. If it’s your child, see the prayer for my son with addiction.
Common questions
Will my prayers make them stop drinking?
No one can promise that. God hears every prayer, and He loves the person more than you do, but He doesn't override anyone's will. Keep praying. Your prayers matter even when you can't see what they're doing.
Should I tell them I'm praying for them?
Sometimes. A simple 'I'm praying for you' can land as love. Using prayer as a lecture usually backfires. If you're not sure, just pray and let your kindness speak.
Is it wrong to pray for myself too?
Not at all. Loving someone who drinks wears you down. Praying for your own peace, wisdom and safety is not selfish. You can't help anyone if you're falling apart.
What can I do besides pray?
Stop covering for them, keep yourself safe, and get support. Groups for families of alcoholics, a pastor or a counselor can all help. You can also gently tell them you're worried and that help is there when they want it.
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