Step 3 of the 12 Steps: Turning Your Will Over to God
Step 3 of the 12 Steps is a decision: you stop trying to run your life on your own and turn your thinking and your actions over to God’s care. You don’t have to feel different to take it. You decide, you pray it, and then you prove the decision by starting Step 4.
What Step 3 says
In the 1939 first edition, the third step reads:
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
Step 1 said “I can’t.” Step 2 said “God can.” Step 3 says “I’ll let him.”
What it means in plain words
Everything in the book up to this point leads to three conclusions, which it sets out on p. 60 of the 4th edition: you couldn’t manage your own life, probably no human power could have relieved your alcoholism, and God could and would if he were sought. Step 3 is what you do once you’re convinced of those three things.
A useful way to say what you’re handing over: “will” is your thinking, and “life” is your actions. You’re not just turning over the bottle. You’re turning over the way you decide things and the way you live.
And notice the word “care.” Many people come to this step expecting to hand themselves over to a harsh boss or a punishing judge. The step says care. You are putting yourself in the hands of someone who wants good for you.
The spiritual principle: faith
The app gives Step 3 the principle of faith. Not certainty. Faith is acting on trust before you can see how it will turn out. In Step 3 that looks like making the decision while you still have questions, and then getting to work.
What the Bible says about Step 3
The app’s verse for Step 3 is Paul’s call to give God your whole self, not just your Sunday self:
“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.”
That is Step 3 in a sentence. Not a feeling, but an offering. Proverbs puts the same idea in terms of direction:
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”
And Jesus himself prayed a third-step prayer in the garden, the night before he died, when every human instinct pulled the other way:
“…saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.””
More passages are on the Step 3 Bible verses page.
How to work Step 3
1. Read pp. 58–63 in your own copy, out loud if you can. This is the start of How It Works, the chapter that lays out the steps. It describes the person who tries to run the whole show like an actor directing every scene, and how that plan keeps falling apart however well meant it is (pp. 60–62). It names self-centeredness as the root of the trouble (p. 62). Then it describes God as the Director, and a new Employer (pp. 62–63). The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions treats this step on pp. 34–41; read it in your own copy. Its theme is that willingness is the key, and that depending on God is how you become truly free.
2. Answer the questions. Where are you running the show? How has that worked out? What scares you about handing it over? The app asks six; they’re on the Step 3 questions page.
3. Pray the Third Step prayer. It’s on p. 63. The book suggests saying it with someone you trust, not alone. Pray it with your sponsor, a pastor, or a friend in recovery. Jimmy or Sarah can pray it with you in the app too, but try to say it with a person as well.
4. Start Step 4 right away. The book goes straight from p. 63 to p. 64. A decision that isn’t acted on fades quickly. Many people start their inventory the same week.
5. Renew it every morning. Pray the Third Step prayer again, or simply tell God you want his way today instead of yours. The decision is made once and renewed daily.
What “done” looks like
You’ve made the decision, you’ve prayed it out loud, ideally with another person, and you’ve started your written inventory. Those three together. Then move on to Step 4.
Talk it through with Jimmy or Sarah — first month free
Jimmy and Sarah are AI sponsors who know the Twelve Steps and the Bible. They'll listen, walk the steps with you, and keep pointing you to real people: a meeting, a sponsor, a church.
Free to download · first month free, no card · adults 18+
After the first month, talking with Jimmy or Sarah needs Plus ($9.99/month or $59.99/year).
Common traps
“I’ll turn it over when I feel ready.” You may wait a long time. Step 3 is a choice made with your will, not a mood you wait for. Romans 12:1 says present yourself. It doesn’t say wait until you feel like it.
Turning over only the drinking. It’s tempting to give God the bottle and keep the bank account, the marriage, the job and the temper. The step says will and life. Ask yourself honestly what you’re holding back.
Waiting weeks before Step 4. Momentum matters. The early members moved through the steps quickly. The longer the gap between Step 3 and Step 4, the more likely self-will is to take the wheel back.
Thinking it’s a one-time event. You’ll catch yourself taking control back, sometimes within the hour. That isn’t failure. It’s why the decision gets renewed each morning.
The Third Step prayer
This is the prayer from p. 63, as printed in the first edition:
God, I offer myself to Thee—to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!
The Third Step prayer page walks through it line by line and offers a plain-language version.
How Jimmy and Sarah help with Step 3
Jimmy and Sarah, the AI sponsors in Steps & Scripture, treat Step 3 as the one real decision in the program. They’ll read the actor passage with you, ask where you’ve been directing the show, and when you’re ready, pray the Third Step prayer with you. Then they’ll ask who else you can pray it with, a sponsor, a pastor or a friend in recovery, and they’ll help you open your Step 4 inventory before the week is out.
Common questions
What is the difference between Step 3 and actually changing?
Step 3 is the decision. The change comes from carrying it out in Steps 4 through 12. Deciding to take a trip isn't the trip, but nobody goes anywhere without deciding first.
What does 'will and life' mean in Step 3?
A simple way to put it: your will is your thinking, and your life is your actions. Step 3 hands both over, not just the drinking.
Where is the Third Step prayer in the Big Book?
On page 63 of the 4th edition, at the end of the section that explains Step 3. The full prayer is on our Third Step prayer page.
Do I need to feel ready before I take Step 3?
No. It is a decision, not a feeling. Many people make it while still afraid. The proof of the decision is starting Step 4 soon after.
Talk it through with Jimmy or Sarah — first month free
Jimmy and Sarah are AI sponsors who know the Twelve Steps and the Bible. They'll listen, walk the steps with you, and keep pointing you to real people: a meeting, a sponsor, a church.
Free to download · first month free, no card · adults 18+
After the first month, talking with Jimmy or Sarah needs Plus ($9.99/month or $59.99/year).
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