August 7: A Craving After a Hard Memory
You were writing about the night you hurt your sister. The memory came back clear and sharp. And then, out of nowhere, you wanted a drink. Badly. Why now?
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”
Hebrews says Jesus isn’t a high priest who can’t relate to our weakness. He was tempted in every way, just as we are, yet without sin. So we can come boldly to God’s throne and find grace to help in time of need.
Step work can stir things up. When you sit with painful memories, your mind reaches for what used to make the pain go away. For years, that was a drink. So it’s no surprise that writing the amends list sometimes brings a craving. It doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means you’re doing something real.
Plan for it. Don’t work on the list late at night when you’re tired and alone. Work on it in the daytime, maybe with coffee, maybe at a church or a library. Have someone you can call when you’re done. Some people do this step with their sponsor sitting right there.
When a craving hits, stop writing. You can come back. Get up and move. Drink some water. Eat something. Call someone and say, “I was working on my list and it got heavy.” Go to a meeting if you can.
And come boldly to God. Not timidly. Boldly. Jesus understands temptation from the inside. He isn’t shocked by your craving. He’s offering grace for exactly this moment.
If you’ve only recently put the drink down after heavy daily drinking, take physical cravings and shakes seriously.
Safety first. If you drink heavily every day, stopping suddenly can be dangerous. Talk to a doctor before you quit.
You can feel the pull and still not follow it. That’s the grace Hebrews is talking about. Help in time of need. And this is a time of need.
If you use Steps & Scripture, you can open the sponsor chat when a list memory hits and say exactly what came up.
One thing today
Before your next session on the amends list, text one person and tell them you’re working on it. Ask them to check on you an hour later.
A prayer
Jesus, You know what temptation feels like. This memory brought a craving with it. I’m coming to You boldly for help right now. Give me grace for this hour. Amen.
More help for the next few minutes is on the alcohol cravings page.
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