August 9: The Servant Who Wouldn't Forgive
There’s someone on your list who owes you. Money, an apology, something. You find yourself thinking, “When they make it right, then I’ll think about my part.” Ever had that thought?
“Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?”
Jesus told a story about a servant who owed his king a fortune. More than he could ever repay. He begged for time, and the king did something amazing. He forgave the whole debt. Wiped it out.
Then that same servant went out and found a man who owed him a small amount. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded payment. When the man begged for time, the servant had him thrown in prison.
When the king heard, he was angry. I forgave you all that debt. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?
It’s a hard story to read, because it’s so easy to be that servant. You’ve been forgiven so much. By God. Maybe by family who stuck around. Maybe by a boss who gave you another chance. And still, there’s a part of you that keeps a ledger on everyone else.
Step Eight asks you to look at your own debts, not what others owe you. That’s not because what they did doesn’t matter. It’s because your recovery depends on not holding onto resentments. The servant who wouldn’t forgive ended up in prison. Resentment has a way of putting us there too.
Here’s a simple exercise. Next to each name on your amends list where you feel “but they owe me,” write what God has forgiven you. Not to shame yourself. To remember. It’s very hard to grab someone by the throat when you remember the king’s mercy.
You don’t have to pretend the debt didn’t happen. You just stop demanding payment.
One thing today
Write down one thing someone owes you. Then write, “God has forgiven me more.” Tear up the first line and keep the second.
A prayer
King of mercy, You forgave me a debt I could never pay. Help me stop grabbing others by the throat. Let the mercy You’ve shown me flow through me to them. Amen.
New to the steps? The Start Here page lays out the whole path.
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